There's an exciting new trailer out for the upcoming G.I. Joe 2: Retaliation and it's got ninjas! Ninjas and a dubstepped remix of some White Stripes. Honestly, this trailer makes up for the entire last movie. I don't even care what the movie is about, I just want it to be 120 minutes of these ninja fight scenes with this song on a loop. The Rock and Bruce Willis can pop in during the credits, like the outtakes scenes in Jacki Chan movies.
While we're on the topic, I've decided there are entirely too few trailers which feature ninjas, dubstep, or some combination thereof. In fact, as of this writing, I can count them on one finger. If I had to make trailers for a living I'd make sure ninjas were in every trailer at least once. People would be like 'Oh look! They're making a new movie of my favorite Jane Austen book!' Then in between the beautiful panoramic shots of Victorian England, they'd get a full helping of Snake-Eyes being awesome.
Potential lawsuits aside, I can almost guarantee double attendance through liberal use of this patented new method. Seriously, it could have saved Parker this weekend...maybe.